Dads to Be: Dealing with Concerns and Fears
November 14, 2009 by Damian Papworth
Filed under pregnancy symptoms
Becoming a father for the first time is, of course, a big deal. A new life is something to be cherished and treasured and yet at the same time, it’s quite a significant change. There’s someone new coming into your life that you will be responsible for; its your job to make sure your child grows up with a solid roof over his/her head, that there’s enough love to go around, that everything is as it should be.
Fatherhood is definitely a life changing event. Many new fathers experience a rollercoaster ride of emotions-it’s not just expectant mothers who are fraught with emotional highs and lows. There’s the excitement of being dad, mixed with fear of not being a good enough parent, along with dread about the changes that will have to be made.
Being a brand new dad means that changes are in store; life as you knew it is over.
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Obviously, this brings up some tensions coupled with a good deal of anxiety and apprehension. When a huge, life changing event such as becoming a new dad is at hand, some people tend to panic, others become distraught and frustrated. But the good news is that these reactions are normal. It’s a very natural reaction.
It can be a difficult time in fact, but confronting the common fears that new dads and dads to be are facing can be quite helpful.
Some widespread fears that tend to plague new fathers and fathers to be include, money, health and life changes.
One major issue revolves around the topic of money. Most people aren’t wealthy and having another mouth to feed in the household does cost some serious dough. Expect to pull those purse strings so to speak. Saving is a necessity. On average, new parents probably will put down some $10,000 on their child. Medical expenses, new furniture, baby food, diapers, clothes, toys, and the list goes on and on.
While it’s not precisely easy to rein in expenses when it comes to the necessities, concessions can be made. Costs can be controlled. Whereas previously, you may have spent more money going out to the movies, or to the pub or to the clubs, those sorts of expenses will probably have to be curtailed. Giving up some things in order to gain others is definitely a huge part of being a father and a parent. Budgeting becomes extremely important. A child, of course, can live without having the best and newest toys. Keep in mind that your most important offering is love.
Another big concern that often comes up has to do with health issues. Many parents, both mothers and fathers to be, are worried about what could go wrong. What would happen if their child’s health is at risk in some way? The good news is that there are solid statistics to reassure even the most nervous of soon to be parents-fully 96-97% of all children are born without any health issues at all. The key is to focus on staying positive and keeping a glass half full attitude. Don’t worry.
Of course, another thing many new dads and dads to be get nervous about is whether or not they will be good dads. It’s a natural concern. But the very fact that you are concerned about being a good father just goes to show that you will be. The simple fact that you care is the first step to becoming a great dad.
Love is what matters. All good fathers simply need to give a whole lot of love.
Damian Papworth is a loving dad and partner. He went so far as to take his spouse shopping recently, she was looking for women’s walking shoes. He found this women’s shoes website very helpful.